Comfortable for What?

3787431220_fec79efd2e_o

Shake, Wobble, Jiggle. Unsteady. Less Control. Ummm like some J-E-L-L-O, that’s how I feel right now. We are on the brink of a season change again, those make me nervous. Since my name is secretly Shemila Stacks, I have decided to gather my nuts all winter like a squirrel. I don’t know, it’s just the hustle in me. This alteration from being so laxed during the summer has gotten me so uneasy. I made the conscious decision to get back to a double work life but then I am resisting at the same time. Silly me.  I am addicted to being uncomfortable, pushing myself to the limit, feeding my creativity, and just living with some aspects of my life being unknown. Predictable is boring, and that I am not! Do I sound crazy yet?  I am just a little nervous about the sacrifices I will have to make in my social and personal life, with special focus on my relationship but guess what? I am still going to jump!

As the season changes, it’s time to think about those goals we need to wrap up for the end of the year. My stretch goal is to be skinny and rich. Not in a literal sense though. Being skinny means feeling amazing in my skin and constantly working on being fit and fine. Pushing myself physically in a progressive way every chance that I get and fueling myself with the right things! Ya know, caring about my body since its my temple. Being rich isn’t all about the moolah or extrinsic things, it’s about having meaningful friendships, shoulders I can cry on and most importantly maintaining my inner peace in the chaotic world I insist on creating for myself. All those cliché things that people say about the little things counting the most, well they are true. I have been practicing giving gratitude every morning and night and am excited to increase this as we enter the season of hot cider, warm sweaters, hay rides, thankfulness, and celebrations with family.

I can honestly say that I am happy about life; I am excited about my journey and cannot wait to make new goals for the new year that will be here before we know it. I may sound like I am little off my rocker but I am not afraid to do whatever I feel necessary on my pursuit to happiness. What are you doing to fight for or maintain your happy? How many times have you hopped up out of that comfort zone for what you want? Like some times you have to do that crazy Kangaroo jump not even knowing where the hell you will land.

“You have to leave the city of your comfort and go into the wilderness of your intuition.”

Much love,

-M

 

Advertisements

Mila Rants…Again

I have been going back and forth with myself regarding my next blog post and what I wanted to write about and everything just seemed like it had a negative undertone. Right now, in this very moment, I do not feel centered. I am just going to sound off about some things that I feel may be bothering me due to my own selfish craving to gain my balance.

Follow The Leader

Too many chiefs, not enough Indians. Yes, I get this term, I know why it exists…blahzay blah but right now I feel like society is living backwards, there is an overabundance of followers and no leaders. We are on our way to hell in a hand basket. It’s disgusting, I feel like I encounter individuals on a daily basis who are too afraid to form their own opinion and they are literally waiting on the some girl on Facebook they haven’t talked to since high school to form it for them through her latest status update or post or whatever they are being called these days. Makes me want to gag, like seriously. I am one to march to the beat of my drum, even with no sticks. It has gotten me made fun of amongst many other things but at least I know who I am and how I feel, on my own. My goodness, wake up people. This goes across all generations, unfortunate. Didn’t your parents ever ask if that annoying ass question about jumping off the bridge with your friends? I guess not because I am convinced that a notable amount of today’s population would dive right on off that bridge with their homies. Our news is someone’s 140 character tweet, we should be ashamed. With an infinite amount of resources, there is no excuse. I mean I am talking from political views to what shoes to buy, no one thinks for themselves anymore. We live in a world full of clones, chameleons, and “Single White Females”. Bring originality back to life!

Yo Problems Aren’t Mine

As a human being who is out here trying to get it, I have issues. Now some of these issues that I have are petty like what nail color I should get the next time I got to the nail salon and some of them are life changing like choosing a career path and deciding who I want to be in society. We all have problems: big, small, medium, super-sized, whatever. But here is where I get bothered; I shouldn’t have to be smothered with your problems as an innocent bystander, co-coworker, stranger standing in the checkout out lane at the grocery store. Keep that shit to yourself, be more private. Quit posting snippets on Facebook or having conversations about it so loud that me, Tom, Dick, Harry and all of us can overhear. The bagger doesn’t want to hear about your husband and his girlfriend, save the drama for yo mama. Yes, we all have an off day where something crazy as eff happens and we have no choice but to interject some drama on some oblivious bystander but those should be moments that are few and far between. Tact, have some. I don’t want my ears beat up every day with someone else’s drama when I’m trying to read Bible scriptures, devotions, and quotes from Pinterest to get through mine. Goodness.

Fear of Flying

Fear is the enemy, the grim reaper, dude from Scream with the white mask on, like all of that. And I know this through and through but I keep on falling victim to it and oh not just me, people around me too! It pisses me off because right now its impacting every single aspect of my life. I have amazing things going on in my life but I am letting fear holding me back from taking some of those things to the next level. Just this week, I received some amazing news and fear has me afraid to fully bask in this news that is literally going to alter my life. I am fighting this battle every moment of every day. Fear will have you over thinking; it will have you doubting yourself, questioning your faith. It will have you in the same unhealthy relationships for years, same ole job you hate; it will even stop you from being happy, grasping success. Ugh, just so much. I won’t stop the fight; I just get a little irritated with myself for taking the victim role when it comes to fear itself. Fate loves the fearless, that’s real. Anything accomplishment worth mentioning occurred when I decided to beat fears ass!

I’m done ranting for now; I’m about to go and hug babies, run through a field of sunflowers, bake cookies or something to get back to a happy place.

“A clear conscience makes a soft pillow.” – African Proverb

-M

Keep it Sweet

  
My music choices are too eclectic to understand. No for real, they go from Gucci Mane to Anita Baker. But in the lyrics, I often find the sweetest messages. Where are you going with this Shemila? Is that what you are thinking? Anyways, it’s almost time for that date that you drew a heart around on your calendar, Valentine’s Day. If you know me personally, then you know that for the past X amount of years, I have been observing it as Single’s Awareness Day instead. The tables have turned and there is a lad who is crazy enough to want to share time with me on this day we call a Hallmark hoax when we are single or without a special someone to share it with. Okay back to the point I was making about song lyrics, I heard Chaka Khan’s Funny Valentine while listening to one of my fav albums, The Waiting to Exhale soundtrack, and it made me sorta mushy.  

She sings, “You make me smile with my heart”. Then she goes on to sing “Your looks are laughable, Un-photographable…yet, you’re my favorite work of art. “ And later she tells us that “Every day is Valentine’s Day.” I bet that she adores/adored the man behind these lyrics that she’s singing so freely. Her lyrics can be used to substantiate a point that I am always trying to reiterate when there is a holiday associated with the exchange of gifts. Gifts are great and make you feel good when received especially when extravagant or well thought out. But a material thing can never overshadow the way you make someone feel through your actions.

Some of us may only see the guy that has the heart eyed emoji by his name in our contacts once every few weeks and some may see this guy on a daily basis. If there is geographical distance, this only means that there are fewer opportunities for the indescribable feeling of gratitude to occur. That feeling that it is Valentine’s Day every day, every time that you interact. Don’t you want that goofy smile on your face all that time, you know, the one you have when you get a cute unexpected text message or email? See, you won’t have that same sort of smile when you open up that expensive perfume or those chocolate covered strawberries from Sherry’s Berries. I’m not saying that I won’t exchange gifts but I am saying that I am after what is intrinsic, those things we cannot explain or quantify. That’s what matters the most to me, those moments that put a smile on my face just before I go to sleep at night.

In my opinion, it’s important not to get caught up in materialism. I’ll take the shack with the man I love over the mansion with a man that it’s not real with. Humph, guess this can be another proclamation to add to my “I will not settle” memoirs. How will you be celebrating your boo, bae, husband, significant other, homie- lover- friend this year?

 Fight for the fairytale, it does exist.

-M

 

Single Redefined

My age is greater than the last time I shared my thoughts and of course once again, I am evaluating my accomplishments and life overall. Where do I want to be? What do I want to achieve next? Ya see, there are several controllables that keep me sane. If I want to be a movie star, I can take acting classes in order to at least feel like I’m working toward my goal. If I want to run a marathon, there’s an application that I can download to my phone that will teach me how to run over a period in time. But those things that I want that I have no control over; those are what haunt me at least once a week, like Michael Myers ready to pounce at any time. The marriage, the husband, the fairytale ending, the “omg I never thought I would find someone to love me” feeling. The other day, a light bulb went off in my head and the heat must have made me schizo for a minute because I heard a voice tell me that being single is not really what it seems. Why does the word have a negative connotation once you hit a certain age or just period? If you don’t have at least like a few exes by the time you graduate high school, you’re a certified weirdo.

According to Webster’s dictionary, the word single means only one in number; one only; unique soul. There are other definitions related to the word such as suitable for one person only, solitary or sole, and unmarried or not in a romantic relationship. Now being the person that I am, I began to dissect these definitions in efforts to retrain my thoughts and find positives. Hmm so unique soul? That is definitely me. See, we were all made to be different and that’s such an attractive thing. I love the fact that I trip over my own feet and laugh it off and that I sometimes snort when I laugh, these are things that make me unique combined with a plethora of other characteristics that would take me countless days to attempt to quantify. Next I thought about what it meant to be solitary or sole, that certainly does not define me. I have a solid support system through my family and friends. As a matter of fact, I would go on to say that a lot of the people in my life admire me and want nothing but for me to excel and grow into a being that I never thought I could be. I have friends who are there that I haven’t talked to in weeks and I have friends that I talk to on a daily basis. I’m blessed and definitely not in any sort of solitude unless I make it my choice.

Why can’t being single be a positive thing? I think it is. I think that once I truly appreciate my uniqueness and accept the fact that yes I’m “unmarried” but I am not in any sort of solitude by any means, that I will become more attractive. We all have struggles due to what we believe life should be like and where we should be in comparison to where we are currently. One of the ways that I was able to grow more confident was “owning” everything that I am. Sometimes I’m a bitch, sometimes I am a pushover, sometimes I’m a slacker, sometimes I’m an over achiever, you get it. Whatever I am, I am me and no one can take that. Today, I own the fact that I am single. I will remain this way until I find someone who will accept all of my weird quirks as well as my colorful group of friends and family that compose my support system.

All my single sistahs, will you own it with me? The world is our runway, let’s work it!

-M

Ms. EClass in the Building!

As adults, we begin to learn that we have to feed our need for intrinsic rewards in order to be happy. As adults, we have responsibilities that cause us to need a steady and dependable income. This often means that we end up sitting at a desk doing something we feel is totally unfulfilling and not in alignment with our destiny. In my life, I have several acquaintances that are in this boat with me but they have found way to row towards their creativity outside of work. I wish to share with you the story of a woman who works forty hours or more per week and fulfills duties associated with being a mother and wife. Even with that full plate, she still finds time to do what she loves in the way that she knows how which is admirable. FullSizeRender 

I interviewed this aspiring female rapper and want to share the dialogue here, check it out: 

Who is Ms. EClass? Ms. EClass is a sassy, does not accept any nonsense whatsoever from anyone, she’s brave, fearless, confident, with zero filter. She is a classy Superstar! 

Do you remember your first set of rhymes? Yes! I was 7 or 8, I wrote them sitting in my room and recorded my song with a cassette tape on my boombox. Is that telling my age? My first song was called, I apologize. I suppose it was a love song, as if! 

Where does your courage come from to endeavor your dreams? First I give All praises to the Most high, My God, I can do all things through him who strengthens me! Deep, deep, deep down inside, I grew up a really shy girl. I had a big voice, begging to get out! The minute I kicked the fear is when I felt more free than I ever have! It was my time! I started making little snippets and posting them to my social networks and the buzz started! 

Who would your dream collaboration be with? On a major scale none other than the impeccable, Onika Maraj, without any doubt! 

What inspires your sound? Depends on my mood. I love making music, period. I’m doing this for everyone who was told they will never be anything or was told you will never make it anywhere because of where you are from. Stay inspired, hard work and dedication and your time will come! My life helps me with writing new material. 

Upcoming projects? I’m so grateful that I am very busy these days. Be on the lookout for my video I am shooting for my song, Party, Ladies First Cypher Part II Akron Edition a new track and video dropping soon as well, a couple performances lined up in Akron, and Columbus. *(Dates to be announced on my pages)* I’m getting beats sent everyday for new material. I’m grinding, I’m just a girl from the small city of Akron ready to take my sound worldwide! 

How can we find you? Hit me up for features! Mseclassmusic@gmail.com Soundcloud.com/mseclass 

Instagram- @mseclass Twitter- @MsEclass 

The first time I heard this song it became an instant fav, check it!

https://soundcloud.com/mseclass/party
Be inspired, be you. -M